And now for something completely different…

The executive management at Villa Kore apologises to the Cross-Poll bloggers who have crossed the portal on the designated day, looked around the foyer and exited after realising that there was nothing to see here.

This has been my year for technical issues. The computers, and yes, I do mean more than one several, have been on a mission to destroy both my credibility and sanity, and they have called in the assistance of Evil Peripherals and the Software Handmaidens of Ultimate Doom to assist them. Always within 12 hours of critical deadlines.

Today it was the turn of WordPress, paying me back for neglecting it for so much of this year. Locked out. Ignoring the password that they so generously gave to me. Multiple emails failed to deliver me a new password and the charming Ryan of WordPress technical support got my hopes up only to leave me standing in the pouring rain staring at the Log-In Screen of No, We Will Not Recognise That Password for almost the entire afternoon. But no matter. I have finally beaten it into submission prevailed.

So without further ado I would like to invite my assigned guest blogger across the threshold. A paragon of grace and patience in the face of my almost total incompetence today, I am honoured to have her pay me a visit.

Things that are wrong on the interwebs

I have proclaimed before that I am a bit of a grammar and spelling Nazi. This
doesn’t preclude me from having typos and non-capital letters in my comments. I excuse
myself by proclaiming that since I’m often typing one handed,or on a blackberry,
it’s excusable. Each to their own particular prejudices. But the misuse or
misunderstanding of certain words on blogs drives me absolutely potty. Here, for what
it’s worth, is an incomplete list.

Wretch/Retch: If you are vomiting you are retching. If you are a very naughty boy
you might be a wretch. It’s not the same thing.

Diffuse/Defuse: You may want to defuse the situation. Diffusing it will be harder
and will involve lots of complicated chemistry.

Elicit/Illicit: You may want to elicit a response to your post. Talking on your
phone while driving is an illicit activity. Unlikely the second word will show up in the
ALI blog community

Vice/Vise: You might choose to describe your vices. We could put you in a vise to
stop you from indulging in them

Accept/Except: You can accept your fate. Except that most of us don’t, and
rage against it on a regular basis. Part of the fabric of this community, in fact.

Farther/Further: Your friends may have moved farther away, you may be choosing to
further your study of African literature.

Moot/Mute: A point is moot. It is also mute, since points, in general, can’t
speak. But you meant the former.

And then there are the phrases people get wrong:
Jerry/Jury-rigged means something has been cobbled together

To all intents and purposes not, “to all intensive purposes”

Flesh out the details, not “flush out the details.” It’s about getting into the nitty gritty, not about an investigative journalism activity.

There are plenty more but of course they’ve slipped my mind right now.

Feel free to add.

So there you have it. Can you guess?  And, for those of you who are well aware of my own grammar, spelling and punctuation pedantry high standards, it is not me trying to play a trick on you. Give me your best guess in the comments. it shouldn’t be hard, we are probably the last two bloggers in the Cross Pollination to deliver, so to speak. You can find out who it is by going here.

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~ by korechronicles on December 10, 2009.

8 Responses to “And now for something completely different…”

  1. OOOOOOOO! A Kore Chronicles updated feed! Hooray!

    This post speaks loudly to me.

    There/Their.
    To/Too.
    People who pronounce specific ‘percific’.
    Gr’oc’e’r’s’ apostrophes.
    The seeming imminent death (apart from on my blog) of the colon and semi-colon.

    And yes, a load more I can’t remember.

  2. And Yes, I did half-guess Thalia!

  3. The rogue apostrophe is in my sights as well. And it’s not just on the interwebs. I’m not sure what it is like elsewhere on the planet but the current crop of newspaper journalists here are appalling.

    And I won’t mention a teacher in a school I was visiting, who told one child writing about how to make pizza, that ‘dough’ was spelt ‘doh’. DOH!

  4. And it might be a local thing, but it seems to be butchers here that are apostrophe challenged.

  5. Oh,boy. Don’t get me started! OK, so I’ve started. Every day (or as some folks would say, everyday), I find the most egregious offenses to the English language by the professional writers and editors at Yahoo. I can forgive the errors (somewhat) by amateur bloggers writing about their grandkids, but not those made by so-called writers. I’m blogging about them over at http://terriblywrite.wordpress.com and welcome your comments.

  6. A friend bought me a shirt that says: “Grammar Ninja. Deadly. Frightening. Articulate.”

    I think that sums in all up right there.

  7. I would not have guessed but yes, yes, YES to a post that the grammar cretins really need to read.

    Also there is a world of difference between ‘regime’ and ‘regimen’.

  8. I came here from her blog, so no guess, but yes, it often irritates me, too. Mainly when it’s a professional publication – does nobody hire copy editors anymore? – and I give an awful lot of leeway to those who are speaking their second language (which I have tried to do a couple of times, but not very successfully). I do sometimes wish that the general standard was higher, though. Do they not teach grammar or latin roots in schools these days? Oh right – they don’t. That must be why.

    Bea

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